Christine is Cherished Page 7

  I was puzzled by the sudden return to coolness by her towards me. Dealing with the uncertainty of Brenda’s changed attitude was not foremost in my mind though. For the first time in my life I had sex with an expecting woman, and I had conflicted feelings. Strange as it sounds from a man that had eagerly been quaffing another man’s sperm from the pussy of the woman sitting next to me, I felt awkward being told that Brenda already had been growing Samuel’s bundle. As I silently considered it, I realized that the source of my conflict was actually jealous disappointment that Samuel had trumped me and thus my essence had been uselessly depleted. Even knowing how endlessly complex impregnating Brenda would have been it was obviously for the best that her egg had previously been overshadowed. I still felt the emptiness of realizing my seed was sown on fallow ground.

  Chapter 9

  James car was not in the driveway when I arrived home, and Christine made no attempt to hide her contempt for me when I walked into the house. She gave me the silent treatment for over half an hour as I watched television.

  Still wordless, she entered the living room and slapped me across the face!

  “What the fuck was that for?” I demanded.

  “Fuck you!” she screamed at me. “What do you think, that I don’t know about this afternoon? Did you even think that Brenda was asked to test you? James had Samuel use Brenda to set you up! And do you want to know WHY?”

  She slapped my other cheek quickly.

  “All quiet now, huh?” she continued yelling at the top of her lungs. “James and I were talking this week and he warned me – no, he FUCKING TOLD ME – that if you had the chance you would break your promises to me! And you know what I said to him? ‘No James, my husband promised that he wouldn’t touch another woman and be completely faithful to me through all this!’ That’s what I told him.”

  She was crying now, and I attempted to get up and hug her. She immediately held out her arm to keep me at distance.

  “No, don’t even try to touch me! Just sit down!” she said sobbing. “I fucking BELIEVED in you! I don’t know why I did in hindsight. You don’t even know what I was considering. You stupid man, I was thinking about taking you back! I was thinking about breaking up with James and trying to repair our marriage.”

  She wiped the salty rivers from her cheeks. Her makeup was now wrecked, and her eyes were red with anger and pain.

  “You don’t even know how high the stakes were today. I was arguing with James, Ben. We were fighting because I defended your love for me and because of the promises you made to me. You forget your promises to me too easily. Just so we are clear, and you know how badly you fucked up today, I will TELL you how high the stakes were. I was getting ready to break up with James because I felt like maybe, just maybe, you missed me enough. I thought maybe you could cherish me as a woman – as your WIFE!”

  “But you don’t understand me, do you?” Christine demanded as she chocked back the flood of emotion. “I bet you still don’t know why I was so angry at you after the first time that James went out of town when I had my period, do you? I want you to tell me – if you can figure it out – why was I so pissed at you?”

  I looked into her forbidding grey eyes, still searching for the source of her anger against me that night. “I ... I don’t know,” I finally said.

  “Ohhhhhhhhhhhh,” she sighed in frustration. “Here I need to tell you about the consequences of your actions this afternoon and you comprehend me so little as to be mystified by that? I am crazy for loving you. Fine I will spell it out for you. I am a woman and you are a man! I am your WIFE and you are my HUSBAND! Did it ever occur to you that having me to yourself for a few days was your chance to try and win me back? I was mad at you, no FURIOUS with you, because you were doing the same thing over again! You were handing your white wife to a black man all over again! Why can’t I get an inkling of possessiveness out of you when it might do our marriage some good?”

  “You have me to yourself for almost a week, and for once in our marriage you were an attentive husband. Do you have any idea how much it hurt me to feel that period – to feel my body expel the last remnants of my HUSBAND’S sperm – then to have you all too ready to hand me over to another man yet again instead of even trying to fight for me? Not for my husband to even try to show he needs me, oh no! Instead my husband chooses to go perpetuate this foolish fetish! My husband would rather let another man enjoy his wife! You chose to let this game go on when you could have tried to win me back. But you chose to let James have me back! You have no idea how much that hurt.”

  “Oh, when James called that first night, he nailed you to a tee. He predicted that you wouldn’t even dare hint at anything about us after he left your wife with her period and needing comfort. I didn’t argue with him then. I figured that you would work up the balls to at least hint that you wanted me back. And don’t start feeling like you have an out because you said you wouldn’t interfere with James and I. If you really wanted me – if you had the capacity to cherish me – then you would have known that I was fucking James to get back at you for offering my married ass to him in the first place! If you really wanted to be with me you would have found a way to communicate with me. But you didn’t bother to use you imagination to come up with a way.”

  She went back to the kitchen and came back with a glass of wine.

  After taking a deep sip she continued, “Why is it so hard for you to understand how I feel? I thought you knew me better. And you disappointed me again today. I was so sure that we understood each other better that I jumped at it when James made the bet with me.”

  Christine walked towards the picture window, gazing over at Brenda and Paul’s house. Outside the twilight hour was almost past, and the living room was becoming rather dark.

  “I argued that you had made promises to me, that you were going to be faithful to me no matter what the temptation. I was ready to break up with him because of the way he abandons me every month when I need to be held by my man,” she said. “He said I was wrong, that you could easily be made to break your word to me, that he was the true man in my life now, and that I had withheld the deepest parts of myself from our relationship.”

  Christine’s voice quieted to a low, straightforward tone when she continued. “He made a bet with me, Ben. We both swore to abide by our word on it. I bet that you would not break your promise to me and be faithful, and if I won you would have proved to me that you cherish me – that you are truly my one and only man. If you passed the test today you would have had your wife back. James bet that if you broke your word to me that I would finally give myself to him fully, that I would relinquish the one thing I have withheld from my relationship from him ...”

  Her voice had tapered off and become ever softer, almost to a humiliated whisper, as it trailed of at the end of that last incomplete sentence. Christine’s lips quivered as if she were freezing from cold.

  “What Christine? What is his demand, this thing he claims that you have withheld?” I asked in fear.

  My wife turned to face me, her grey eyes staring narrowly at me only half illuminated by the fading sunlight from outside.

  “He wants me to have my IUD removed,” she finally said breathlessly.

  “What!?” I exclaimed. “No way! No fucking way will I allow it! This has already gone on too long!”

  Christine didn’t say a word and kept her icy stare transfixed on my eyes. She held that look for a very long time before she spoke, then saying, “You are going to try dictating ANYTHING to me right now, just home freshly fucked by another woman? You expect me to hold the fire for you when you can’t even keep your word to me and keep your dick in your pants?”

  “But Honey, this is different,” I tried to explain.

  “Different how? You made me a promise that you were going to cherish me and forsake all others. James is not without problems as the man in my life, no argument there. He is emotionally unsupportive, and I know that will never change. But at least he seems to cherish
me, the very thing I long for and wanted from you.”

  Christine broke her eye contact from me, and looked out the window again. “I have already made my choice. I called and left a message at my gynecologist after I heard you fucking Brenda. Oh yeah, by the way, Brenda’s wireless phone was on the whole time ... I heard everything until I got so disgusted with you that I hung up.”

  “I don’t know what will happen with my relationship with James. In spite of everything I still do love you. But I have decided to surrender to him completely and you have yourself to blame. Maybe nothing will come of it ... but after today I have decided that he will have a chance at being the father of my first baby. I could blame it on that stupid bet. But Ben, I want you to know that isn’t the reason I am removing my birth control.”

  Christine quickly turned and stared me down again. “I want you to know that I am giving him this chance because he has proven himself as a man to me ... that he keeps his promises to me – and maybe you need to have it demonstrated to you once and for all that I want a man who is able to keep his word to me. I want you to see that I WILL reward a man that keeps his promises to me. I have no doubt, for instance, that if I had won my bet today that James would have backed down and we would be rekindling our marriage right now – on OUR marital bed.”

  I was crushed at what my selfishness had wrought. Through tears I finally asked, “How long does he expect you to not use birth control?”

  “It isn’t about time Ben. He wants to take our relationship to deeper levels. This is the next, natural progression, for a couple in a relationship. Why should I keep holding back in my relationship with James anymore? His argument to me for the last month has been that I have been holding myself back for you, that he felt like my reservations were unfair to him and OUR relationship – his and mine. And do you know what Ben - he has a point. I have been saving myself for you. I have held back from him. He has been keeping his word to me and you have failed. After this afternoon why shouldn’t I go deeper into the relationship with James?”

  Christine took another long sip of her wine before saying, “There is another thing that will change now.”

  “What is that?” I asked.

  “James told me that he wants you to watch us make love from now on. He wants you to watch, and KNOW that he is trying to make me pregnant. I argued with him at first because I feel that when we make love should be private. But he convinced me that it is for the best that you should see your wife get pregnant, even if you are so perverted that you would actually like it if it was another man taking your place as my husband!”

  Chapter 10

  Christine’s new gynecologist was a friend of Sir James, and as part of my punishment for giving in to Brenda’s charms was that I had to chauffer her to her appointment. The doctor had an appointment open for Monday afternoon, and Christine had quickly accepted it.

  As we drove to the appointment I felt certain that James had made sure that such a quick time for the procedure had been set up before setting me up with Brenda. When we arrived I was able to meet Christine’s new gynecologist, and was not surprised that he was black. It was humiliating to know that he was yet another black man that would be seeing my wife’s naked pussy.

  As I sat alone in the waiting room receiving more than one look from the receptionist. She was a cute, curvy, black woman and at first I thought she was checking me out.

  “So I hear that your wife likes black men!” she finally said with a smile.

  I was shocked to have a complete stranger comment on my wife’s sex life with James. I felt flush in the face, and was speechless.

  “It’s okay, nothing to get embarrassed about,” she said with a wink. “Do you think you’re the first white man that got caught up in wanting to see your wife with a black stud? Personally, I don’t know what gets into you guys. Either you are really brave or dumb! But to each their own.”

  Christine was sore for a few days after her appointment, and the doctor had given her a couple of prescriptions to help with the pain and risk of infection. True to his form James was scarce when she was not ready for sex. I knew that his lack of emotional support really bothered my wife. However, I was still in the dog house for screwing up with Brenda. Strangely, Christine didn’t blame Brenda for what happened – AT ALL! I didn’t think this was fair, but in my wife’s view it was me that had failed her. She viewed Brenda as having gone along with the test purely at the request of James and Samuel.

  Anyway, Christine and I were sharing a morning cup of coffee. Fallout from the Brenda episode was starting to fade, and we were starting to get along when we heard a knock at the front door. When I went to check, I found a crying Brenda at the door.

  “Ben, is Christine here?” she asked. “I need to talk to her.”

  “Yeah, come on in.” I responded. “She’s having a cup of coffee in the kitchen.”

  I let Brenda in, and we both went to Christine.

  “Oh Christine! The worst thing has happened,” Brenda said.

  “What’s wrong?” asked Christine, standing and giving Brenda a hug.

  “Paul left me a note. He can’t deal with me being pregnant by Samuel. He’s leaving me! He moved over to the motel, and now I don’t know what to do!”

  “Oh Brenda, I’m so sorry!” Christine said sympathetically. “Ben, could you maybe go out and mow the lawn or something and give us some time.”

  “Yeah sure,” I responded.

  I went outside, but didn’t feel like doing any yard work. Instead, I went to the back patio and lounged in the morning sunlight.

  After about an hour Christine found me. She looked a bit shaken.

  “Ben, I have a favor I want you to do,” she said. “I feel for Brenda and her situation. I want you to go and talk to Paul. See if you can get him to change his mind and come back to Brenda. She loves him, and is willing to break up with Samuel to get Paul back.”

  I agreed, and left. As I drove towards town I gave Paul a ring on his wireless phone.

  “Hi,” Paul said when he answered.

  “Hi Paul. It’s Ben.”

  “What’s up?”

  “I could ask you the same,” I responded.

  “I guess you heard.”

  “Women talk, you know how it is,” I said. “Hey look, we’ve gotten pretty close. It’s almost lunchtime. Let’s meet up and talk.”

  “Where?” he asked.

  “How about at the motel bar in a half hour? We could grab some appetizers and maybe a beer or two.”

  “Good.” he answered, and we both hung up.

  I arrived before him, and took a booth as far from the bar as I could. By the time that Paul arrived there was a cold pitcher of suds waiting.

  “I assume you know that she is pregnant by Samuel,” Paul said as he poured himself a beer.

  “Yeah, I heard,” I responded. This was the first time that I had seen Paul since last Saturday when I was with Brenda. It seemed to me that Paul had no idea what had happened between Brenda and I, because he didn’t seem angry at all. Momentarily, I was caught off guard as I was expecting to have to deal with the issue. I felt very, very lucky.

  “This is too much,” he said. “I don’t think I can handle my wife having his baby.”

  “She told Christine that she loves you and wants to reconcile. She’s even willing to break up with Samuel.”

  “We’ve been both living with this situation, but I have to tell you it is different now. It is enough to drive a man insane when his wife is pregnant by another man, Ben. I know you don’t know how this feels, and I hope you never do. But the jealousy is crazy,” he said.

  His words filled me with fear, knowing that I had fucked up so badly and Christine had her birth control removed. I felt impending doom, that my precious wife might also get caught in a similar situation. I knew that I was still out of her good graces, and couldn’t effect her decision to give in to her black lover. But I felt a rush of adrenaline through my body at the risk of my wife being
caught up in a pregnancy.

  “Well, Christine is not pregnant so I can’t say that I’ve been in your shoes,” I said. “But she has decided to have unprotected sex with James.”

  Paul looked at me and said, “Make no mistake about it Ben, he WILL get her pregnant. These black men know what they are doing, and they know that once they catch our wives with their babies they have permanently marked our white wives.”

  I knew Paul was right, that this was the ultimate outward sign that these black men had conquered us. But the thought of my sweet white wife, unprotected and willingly exposed to a black man’s potent sperm was causing me to have a raging hard on!

  “I can’t stop her now,” I responded. “But I might get lucky and she might not get pregnant and end up breaking up with him.”

  Paul thought about it for a minute and then responded, “So you said that Brenda is willing to break up with Samuel if I come home?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, I have to think about it. I do love her too,” Paul said. “But I just feel like Brenda and I will be so ostracized if we have the baby. I feel like no one will want to be seen with us, like the baby will be a scarlet letter’ on us, so to speak.”

  “I can tell you that Christine and I will always be friends with Brenda and you, and that the baby won’t make us abandon you,” I reassured.

  “I need a few days to think about it Ben. But make sure that Brenda knows that I do love her too,” he said.

  “We’ve been through a lot together. Who knows, maybe we will end up both in the same situation,” I responded.

  It was a heartening moment for us, given all that we had shared in cuckoldry. The idea that our wives might both hand us mulatto babies from affairs that we created was mood lightening, and Paul and I were both able to laugh – if only for a short time.

  Chapter 11

  Sir James ordered me to prepare Christine for the ultimate consummation of their relationship. I was told to have a camcorder set up on a tripod in the bedroom. I was also instructed to drive her to the day spa in town, and paid for her to have manicure and pedicure. I sat in the waiting area, within earshot, as my wife was attended to.